Meanest Dog On The Block

I think the contemporary ensemble action movie, all be it on a larger scale, would be a good model to base our military on. First assemble the team. Remember, we have the whole United States, Puerto Rico, and the Philippines to choose our team from. At over four hundred million, that’s a pretty good pool to pick from. We can maybe have some kind of contest to figure out who’s the quarter million smartest, baddest people out there. I don’t know what the right number is? Maybe we could cut that down to a hundred and fifty thousand or so and then get another hundred thousand geek types for support people.

Then we train them. We get people like Lou Gossett Jr in An Officer and a Gentleman, Or like Jack Web from that old D.I. movie. You know; the grizzled veteran, the tough as nails sergeant, the one that acts like the meanest sob on the planet but deep down loves his boys and is just trying to keep them alive when they get in the thick of it. And by boys I’m not saying anything about gender here. If Angelina Jolie is any indication, chicks can be every bit as bad ass as guys. And don’t forget all those school-of-hard-knocks convicts secretly waiting for the chance to prove themselves for God and Country.

Then we supply them. I mean this is the United States of America. We can buy the best stuff. We can buy the baddest, the toughest stuff. And if we can’t buy it we can damn well buy who ever we have to buy to make it. I mean we pull out all the stops. We give them all the James Bond Q shit we can come up with.

Next we get the transportation up and running so they’re ready to go at a moment’s notice. I mean these guys are more than ready. They just need time for the drinkers to sober up and recover from their bonding bar fights. They can do that on the transports.

We got guys like that and eventually word’s going to get out we’re the meanest dog on the block. We can come up with some cheesy motto like, “We don’t start fights, we end them,” or, “Mess with us and we’ll kick your ass.” They can carry that Texas “Don’t Tread On Me” coiled rattlesnake flag.

We can talk about the spy section later.