Why not? What do you have to lose?

Now that Mitt has been grudgingly declared the front runner for the republicans and nobody else seems to want to run on the democratic side I am officially shrugging my shoulders and throwing my hat into the ring under the platform of, “Why not? What do you have to lose? I can’t be much worse than any of these other Bozos.”

My campaign promises are to put people back to work with something like the CCC or the WPA. Not going whole hog on high speed rail is pretty asinine. Our rail system needs to be completely rebuilt any way. That and everybody knows our bridges and national infrastructure is falling apart. If we decide to fix that, that’s got to be hell of a lot of jobs waiting on somebody. I’ll create an infrastructure tsar with a limited number of people under him to make sure the money is not wasted on some over bloated bureaucracy.

Speaking of money I will institute an income disclosure policy where all government employees and affiliates will be required to accurately report their income. There will be some kind of reasonable cap on their incomes. Anybody caught violating this rule will be fired.

I further promise to put some people at the top of the financial industry and, if applicable, the people charged with watching out for that shit who looked the other way will be in jail for a long time. I will do away with the idea that corporations are people.

Something has got to be done about tax fairness. I’m not sure what but the mega rich and giant corporations paying next to nothing will end.

I promise not to pretend global warming isn’t real, no matter what caused it, or engage in any other spurious debates like the birther crap.

I promise to restrict the house and senate to live with the health care they pass for everybody else. That’s my wife's idea.

I know there’s a lot of other things all screwed up so I promise to surround myself with other people from the appropriate fields a lot smarter than me to begin to figure out what the hell we can do to fix some of it.

Finally in full discloser, I have plenty of skeletons in various closets so if you’re looking for somebody squeaky clean it aint me, but I’ll leave the doors open and you’re free to look around. My wife also likes to decorate so she’s going to change some things in the white house. She's got great taste and design sense but it’s not going to be cheap.